Side Lying / Position Guide
PretzelSex Position
Not quite on the side, not quite on the back. The twist in between does the work.
The pretzel sex position puts the receiving partner on one side, bottom leg stretched long, with the giving partner kneeling over that leg and facing them. The top leg then curls around the kneeler's waist, and the pelvis rolls partway up toward the ceiling. It looks like a knot. In practice it works more like a dial.
Some sites call it the pretzel dip sex position. Same shape, longer name. What it offers is an angle you will not find by lying on your side or by lying flat, and you get it with your faces close together and nobody holding themselves up on straining arms. The only real skill? Deciding how far to twist.
What The PretzelSex Position Is
Begin with the receiving partner lying on the left side, the lower leg straight along the mattress. The giving partner kneels over it, one knee either side of that thigh, facing the receiving partner's front. Now the upper knee bends. That top leg hooks around the kneeler's waist or hip, and the top hip goes along for the ride, rolling backward until the pelvis points somewhere between the wall and the ceiling. (That half turn is the whole position, really.)
Two neighboring positions cause confusion. The T-bone position brings the giving partner in across the body at a right angle, legs together, with no wrap and no twist at all. Spooning sex tucks one of you behind the other, both on your sides, for entry from the back. Only the pretzel keeps you face to face while it turns the hips open.
The pretzel position has a reputation for being advanced, mostly because of what it is called. Blame the name.
Why TheTwist Matters
On the side, you get one angle. Flat on the back, as in missionary, you get another. Twisting parks the pelvis between those two, so entry comes in on a diagonal that reaches deeper than side lying tends to allow and presses somewhere that lying flat simply misses. Not a compromise. A third angle entirely.
Each of you gets a hand on the controls. A palm on the top thigh lets the giving partner guide that leg further round, which opens the hips, or let it drift home, which closes them. The receiving partner has the bigger lever, though. With the wrapped leg propping the pelvis open, dropping the shoulders down toward the side winds the twist tighter and sharpens the angle, while lifting them toward the back lets it all unwind.
And then comes the part the name hides. Your faces are close. Eye contact happens without trying, and neither person is propping up their own weight. The giving partner even has a spare hand within easy reach for direct stimulation, which the female orgasm guide ranks above any angle.
Where are the shoulders?
Move the slider and watch the shoulders tighten or loosen the twist.
How To ActuallyDo It
- 1
Stretch the lower leg out straight
Lying on one side, the receiving partner keeps the bottom leg long. Bend it and it ends up under the kneeling partner, where it only gets in the way.
- 2
Straddle that leg and come close
The giving partner kneels astride the straight leg, facing the receiving partner's front. Shuffle up toward the hips. Reaching from further down the bed is a quick route to a sore back.
- 3
Hook the top leg and let the hip follow
Bend the upper knee and curl that leg around the giving partner's waist. The top hip should turn back along with it, not stay piled on the lower one.
- 4
Adjust with a hand and the shoulders
The giving partner eases the top thigh open or closed, and the receiving partner rolls the shoulders to match. When the angle lands, say so.
- 5
Swap to the opposite side
Lying on the left and lying on the right send the rotation through the hips in opposite directions. Try each one, tonight or some other night, before you crown a favorite.
Knees, HipsAnd The Lower Back
Two joints complain in this one, and they belong to different people. The giving partner's knees do the kneeling, and straddling a leg spreads them a little wider than usual, which the inner knee tends to notice. On a firm bed, a folded towel or pillow under each knee fixes it.
Meanwhile the receiving partner's hips carry the twist. Wrapping the top leg asks a hip to open and rotate in one go, and whatever that hip refuses, the lower back quietly picks up. So here is the rule. Feel a pinch in the hip or lower back? Stop right there, roll the shoulders a little further toward the back, and try again from that spot. A twist that pinches has overshot.
Gripping tires the wrapped leg fast. Let it lie around the waist instead of squeezing, and let the giving partner's hand take some of its weight. Start slowly, and keep lube close by.
Four WaysTo Retie It
Pillow beneath the bottom hip. Slide something firm under the hip the receiving partner is lying on. The pelvis lifts, the twist holds itself steady, and the wrapped leg no longer has to do that job. Reach for this first if the angle keeps sliding away.
Top leg up on the shoulder. Rather than circling the waist, that leg rests on the giving partner's shoulder. The diagonal steepens, entry deepens, and the hip has to open further to allow it. Call it the intense end of the dial.
Rolling further onto the back. The receiving partner lets the lower shoulder lift until they are almost flat. Depth eases off. Eye contact gets better, and the hips get a rest.
Leaning in on one hand. The giving partner plants a hand beside the receiving partner's shoulder and leans over them, which closes the distance for kissing and nudges the angle a little. One wrist takes the load. Treat it as a place to visit, not a place to live.
The versions, drawn
A pillow under the lower hip
It lifts the pelvis and holds the twist steady, so the wrapped leg does not have to. Try this first if the angle keeps slipping.
Top leg on the shoulder
The diagonal gets steeper and the entry deeper, and the hip has to open further. The intense end of the dial.
Lean in on one hand
The giving partner plants a hand beside the shoulder and comes close enough to kiss. One wrist carries it, so visit rather than stay.
What is your pretzel tonight?
Tap the mood.
WhoIt Is Best For
Pretzel sex suits couples who love how restful side lying positions are but wish they went deeper. Stuck in a rut with the usual rotation? Here is a new angle with no acrobatics, and the twist gives it several settings instead of just one.
A hip or lower back that hates rotating will not enjoy it, because the twist is the entire position and no version skips it. Partners who say what they feel get the most from it, and talking during sex becomes less awkward the more you do it.
Test both sides before you decide anything. With the receiving partner on the left, the twist turns the hips in one direction, and on the right it turns them in the other, so the two setups are not interchangeable. The side saddle position has its own left and right quirk, for a different reason.
What GoesWrong
Wrapping the leg with the hips still stacked
If only the leg moves and the pelvis stays square to the wall, the hip takes all the strain and the angle does not budge. Let the top hip roll back along with the leg.
Reading a pinch as almost there
Trouble shows up in the hip or lower back first. A pinch is a signal to unwind the shoulders slightly, not a sign that the good angle is one more shove away.
Giving up after trying one side
Left and right rotate the hips in opposite directions, and that alone can flip the verdict. Build it again as a mirror image before deciding it does nothing for you.
Questions PeopleAsk
What is the pretzel sex position?
In the pretzel sex position, one partner rests on their side, lower leg straight, while the other kneels astride that leg, facing them, and the receiving partner's top leg wraps around the kneeler. That wrap twists the pelvis to a point halfway between side lying and lying on the back, giving deep, angled entry.
Is the pretzel dip sex position the same thing?
Yes. Pretzel dip is simply an alternate label for this setup, where the receiving partner twists half onto the side and wraps the top leg around the kneeler.
How is the pretzel position different from the T-bone?
In a T-bone, the giving partner enters at a right angle across the body and the receiving partner keeps both legs together. The pretzel is face to face instead, with the top leg wrapped around the kneeling partner and the pelvis twisted partway up toward the ceiling.
How do you make pretzel sex deeper or gentler?
To go deeper, roll the receiving partner's shoulders further onto the side, or put the top leg up on the kneeling partner's shoulder. To ease off, roll the shoulders back. Either way, the giving partner's hand on the top thigh handles the fine tuning.
Is lying on the left different from the right?
Often, yes. The twist rotates the hips in opposite directions depending on the side, so the two can feel quite different. Try each before you settle.