On Top / Position Guide
Side SaddleSex Position
The only position here with a left and a right, and they are not the same.
Side saddle has the receiving partner sitting across the giving partner's lap with both legs together off to one side, rather than straddling with a leg either side. The giving partner lies back or reclines on their elbows. It is cowgirl turned a quarter of the way round.
That quarter turn does something no other position on this site does. It makes the position asymmetric, which means there are two versions of it, and they do not feel the same. Most couples find one, form a view, and never discover that the mirror image was the better one.
What SideSaddle Is
The giving partner lies on their back or props themselves on their elbows. The receiving partner sits across their hips with both knees together and angled off to one side, supporting themselves with a hand on the bed or on their partner's chest.
Because the legs are off to one side rather than either side, the hips meet at an angle rather than square on. The reach is shorter than in cowgirl and the pressure lands off center, which is the entire character of the position.
It turns up on lists of position guides as a cowgirl variation, which undersells it. Changing the axis is a bigger change than changing the lean, and it produces something that does not feel like a version of anything else.
Why There AreTwo Of Them
Nearly every position here is symmetrical. Swapping left for right in missionary or doggy style changes nothing at all, which is why nobody ever thinks about it. Side saddle is not symmetrical, so the two mirror images are structurally different positions.
They produce pressure on opposite sides, and one side usually works noticeably better. Which one is not predictable and there is no general rule worth repeating, which is exactly why it is worth testing rather than assuming.
The practical consequence is simple. If you tried side saddle once and were unimpressed, you have tested half of it. Setting it up the other way takes about five seconds and is the most likely fix. The cross has the same handedness for the same underlying reason.
How far round are the legs?
Slide it from straddling to fully side on. The middle is where most of the useful angle lives.
How To ActuallyDo It
- 1
Start straddling, then rotate
Get settled square on first and swing both knees round to one side. Rotating from a comfortable start is much easier than arriving side on.
- 2
Pick a side deliberately
Note which side you chose. The whole point of this position is that the other one is different, and you want to be able to compare.
- 3
Plant a hand
On the bed behind or on your partner's chest. This position has less stability than straddling and the hand is what supplies it.
- 4
Rock rather than lift
The reach is short and off center. Small rocking movements work here. Trying to move as you would in cowgirl loses the angle.
- 5
Try the other side another night
Five seconds to set up and the most likely reason a first attempt disappointed. Treat it as a different position, because it is.
ComfortAnd Stability
Stability is the thing this position gives up compared to straddling, since the weight is no longer balanced either side. A planted hand solves it, and the giving partner's hands on the hips solve the rest. It is worth arranging before you start moving rather than discovering mid rock.
The receiving partner's knees and outer hip carry more than in cowgirl, and on a firm surface that gets uncomfortable. A pillow under the supporting hip or knee removes it entirely and costs nothing.
The angle is off center and the reach is short, so this is a grinding position rather than a deep one. That means friction builds over a long session rather than depth being the issue, and lube earns its place accordingly.
VersionsWorth Trying
Leaning back onto the hand behind opens the angle further and changes where the pressure lands, at the cost of some of the closeness. It is a noticeably different position again from sitting upright.
The giving partner propping themselves on their elbows brings the two of you closer and gives them some control over the rhythm, which side saddle otherwise hands almost entirely to the person on top.
Swapping to the other side is the version almost nobody tries and the one most likely to change their mind about the position. For the square on version with all the same control, cowgirl is the page to read.
What is your side saddle tonight?
Tap the mood.
WhoIt Is Best For
This suits couples who like cowgirl but have worn it out, and anyone who has noticed the good spot is off center rather than straight on. It hands pace and depth to the person on top in the same way cowgirl does, with a different angle attached.
It is a weaker choice when depth is the aim, since the reach is short by design. It is also less stable than straddling, which matters more on a soft mattress. If the first attempt did nothing, try the other side before concluding anything, because that is genuinely half the position.
What GoesWrong
Never trying the other side
The two mirror images produce pressure on opposite sides and they are not the same position. Five seconds to set up, and skipping it is the most likely reason a first attempt gets written off.
Moving before planting a hand
This is less stable than straddling because the weight is not balanced either side. A hand on the bed or on your partner goes down before anything starts moving, not after the first wobble.
Lifting instead of rocking
The reach is short and off center. Small rocking movements work here and trying to lift straight up loses the alignment the position depends on.
Questions PeopleAsk
What is the side saddle sex position?
The receiving partner sits across the giving partner's lap with both legs together off to one side rather than straddling. The hips meet at an angle, which shortens the reach and moves the pressure off center.
What is the difference between side saddle and cowgirl?
The axis. Cowgirl is square on with a leg either side. Side saddle is rotated a quarter turn with both legs to one side, which produces off center pressure and a shorter reach.
Does it matter which side you sit on?
Yes, and this is the main thing to know about the position. The two mirror images are structurally different and produce pressure on opposite sides. One side usually works better, and which one is not predictable.
Why does side saddle feel unstable?
Because the weight is no longer balanced either side as it is when straddling. Planting a hand on the bed or on your partner's chest supplies the stability, and the giving partner holding the hips adds the rest.
Is side saddle deep?
No. The reach is short by design because of the angle, which makes it a grinding position rather than a deep one. If depth is what you want, cowgirl square on is the better choice.